Mission
The RAD Unconference manifests radical, political, anti-oppressive, inspiring non-monogamy practice through a series of participatory break-out discussions, art, zine creation, community building, fun, and more. This unconference and community centers the voices, needs, and lives of those practicing Relationship Anarchy.
A supportive, exclusive, anarchist-centered space is critically needed for folks who are living and practicing RA, and repeatedly compromised by folks who are NOT practicing RA who center outsider questions/ needs/ experiences/ defensiveness/ education/ apolitical framing of non-monogamy. This conference is in part a response to those experiences of being de-centered in what is ostensibly RA space. We want a space to connect with other folks with lived experience of RA for community, support, and radical inspiration.
Our goal is to develop community, theory and praxis for applying anti-authorian principles of autonomy and mutual aid to interpersonal relationships: relationship anarchism! The anti-monogamy we are trying to build is anti-capitalist, anti-racist and anti-ableist, for a start (and queer too, obviously!). These violent systems are all interconnected and must be destroyed. Our relationship anarchism is radically political and a revolutionary work-in-progress.
This is not an outward-focused event for explaining, justifying, and defending RA to “others.” Space will not be made to discuss and focus on polyamory and other general non-mono topics.
Not practicing RA but want to learn more? The unconference and associated community are not for you, but we encourage you to learn more
About
Why have this event and whom is it for?
This is a space for people who strive to practice relationships based in joy, desire, and authenticity. People who reject the norms of monogamism, decenter romantic/sexual “couple” relationships, and want a space to converse with, challenge and inspire each other, without having to explain or justify these politics.
There are very few spaces where most of us are able to center our own relationship values. We need occasions to "face inward" and interface with others already sharing and living our politicised relationship values. Many of us have found the RAD unconference to meet these needs year after year.
How do I attend?
Submitting an attendance proposal is the first step! It involves answering some questions & sharing a bit about relationship values.
Suggested contribution $50-$150+, because the Unconference is not free to host and we particularly want to be able to compensate a keynote speaker fairly. No-one will be turned away for lack of funds.
What if I'm unfamiliar with relationship anarchy/anarchism and want to learn more?
If you're interested in relationship anarchy and would like to learn more, that's awesome! This event isn't the right fit for you (at least this year!) but here are some resources for you to explore:
visit our resources page
visit the general Relationship Anarchy info and discussion group on Facebook (not run by us)
visit Kale’s resources and videos which are a great introduction
You also might want to find a local non-mono (or even an RA group) near you; but be advised that most non-monogamy has almost no overlap with RA practices and values!
So what actually *is* this unconference? What will it be like?
An unconference is a participant-driven process of self-organization where the sessions and topics are created on-site by those attending. Instead of preparing a pre-set agenda, we have a schedule of time-blocks, during which participants propose and decide what will happen in each time block shortly before it begins.
There will be some pre-set events, such as a keynote speaker, and some evening recreational activities, but most of the time-blocks will have their content decided upon by you! We will offer a process/mechanism for topic-selection, our unconference is based on trusting participants to self-organize cooperatively with each other, to advocate for themselves, support one another, and to co-create a liberatory space for dialogue and praxis.
As a digital/in-person hybrid unconference, we will be interacting on a few different platforms, including a synchronous video chat platform for both large group and break-out interactions, and an event discord for asynchronous collaboration/discussions.
History: How did this event happen and who is organizing it?
RAD was born from a local Detroit discussion group that wanted to explore what it meant to practice relationships through a lens of anarchistic values. The idea of the unconference was born from a discovery that there were enough people interested that wanted to differentiate themselves from other local groups focused on a more broad non monogamy. The first year we were able to scrape enough money to provide a place to stay, food to eat, a lot of transportation, and a totally radical speaker, without turning anyone away for lack of funds. Those of us that organized the first gathering were so elated to see how so many strangers with enough shared values came together, created the space beyond our fantasies, and made sure everything was cleaned up at the end all through voluntary mutual effort.
This planted a deep seed in enough of our hearts to keep this project going year after year. We include a variety of experiences and identities: all of us are queer, most of us are some variety of trans/non-binary, some ace and arospec, and some of us are neurodivergent and chronically ill.
Accessibility
Accessibility is a priority for this event!
We’re working to keep the conference as financially accessible as possible.
There will be digital and in person “quiet spaces” and/or meditation room(s).
We are working to normalize different ways people might want or need to engage with the space (e.g., leaving and returning, camera on/off, participating lying down, lots more.).
We will provide information to help people connect to the platform and solve problems.
We will explain what the platform looks like in terms of movement on the screen and options for minimizing that.
We will provide instructions for how to edit your screen name and add your pronouns. Adding your pronouns is not a requirement, and if you see someone without pronouns next to their name, we ask that you please use their name only to refer to them (please avoid guessing or imposing any presumed pronouns).
If possible we ask everyone in online spaces to use headphones to minimize outside noise and feedback loops.
If you have other concerns or needs related to accessibility and/or the online platform, please let us know.
We have been exploring live-captioning options and are still open to ideas/help, but so far have not been able to find a secure/affordable way to provide this service balanced with privacy concerns.
We are open to helping with childcare arrangements, and other types of accessibility arrangements.
We will do our best to make sure that food works with people’s dietary needs/restrictions.
If you have skills, knowledge, or resources to help make this event more accessible to more RAs, please reach out!
More details about the accessibility of our in person space will be available close to the event as we have a more concrete picture of the exact location we will be hosting the unconference at. (steps, door dimensions, other perceived barriers and/or accommodations)
We welcome your messages about accessibility, please include information about your access needs and/or how you can contribute to meeting others’ access needs in your attendance proposal, and/or contact us (radunconference@gmail.com).
The Unconference is Not “Free”
We don’t want to set up a compulsory financial contribution (barrier) to access this event / community / resources. No-one will be turned away for lack of funds.
But that doesn’t mean there aren’t costs.
There are huge costs of organizing, including first and foremost: the often undervalued and unacknowledged labor, especially that performed by gender minorities. Additionally, space, materials, outreach, food, lodging, unpaid time off from folks’ paid “day jobs,” and much more.
Free (and low cost by donation) group co-housing is available, as well as free meals throughout the conference. Free transportation within Detroit can also be arranged for those who need it (to/from the airport). We are also hoping to be able to support people who face barriers related to technology/internet, etc., with being able to access the space. This is possible through the mutual aid/support/donations of our small grassroots community, and the support of attendees for one another.
Money is also necessary to support projects like printing physical copies of zines and other resources that are produced at the event, ongoing workshops and educational activities that build community capacity, and to begin collecting funds for our next in-person RAD Unconference (so we are ready when the time comes).
So we want to recognize that the costs of RAD are being subsidized by folks who are contributing. We hope that those who are willing and able will give as much as they can (financially and otherwise) in order for it to be possible for everyone who needs access to participate.
No one organizing RAD is making any money off the event;to the contrary, people are contributing their own funds, and thousands of hours of unpaid labor to make this happen.
Spread the Word!
Share this zine from RAD 2019.
Post in any anarchist or non-mongamy spaces you belong to.
To catch the few, cast a wide net. In other words, share widely even if there's only a small chance of catching a few RAs in the wild!
Attendance Proposal
This is an intimate community experience and will be capped - we receive more proposals than we wish to accommodate. Submitting your attendance proposal for the unconference is a great first step!
So excited for your interest in co-creating our shared vision for a Relationship Anarchism Unconference. This event is dreamt of as a way for folx, who have been unlearning the violence of the couple form, to come together and dive deep into our own lived experiences. In order to create conditions for that vulnerability, we have a process of mutual discernment. This is the beginning of a conversation of mutual discernment. We (the planning team including Benzi, Kelli, Peatmoss, Grey, Jennie & Lake) will be reading your proposal and sending you a response with information about next steps in the mutual discernment process. We will try to respond within 2 weeks to schedule a conversation with you to discern whether the Unconference is a good fit for you. (Please let us know if you have access needs that can make responding to communications difficult; we’re excited to help problem-solve with you to get this done!)
Here are a few example questions if you’re curious about the types of things we’re interested in talking to you about:
What are your hopes and your fears for this conference?
How will you address it if you see your fears taking shape?
How do your relationship values intersect with larger social structures and how do you feel about those things?
What distinguishes your practice of relationship anarchy/non-monogamism from general “ethical non-monogamy” or polyamory? What do you believe are the key differences?
If this attendance proposal form presents a barrier and it would be easier to have this "conversation" another way, please contact us at radunconference@gmail.com and we can discuss other options!
Submitting your attendance proposal is free but required for each participant.
Suggested donation $50-$150+ for those who are ultimately confirmed to attend. Please don’t allow an inability to donate financially to prevent you from attending; you are welcome if you do not donate at this time (or even later on). No-one will be turned away for lack of funds!
We care about keeping RAD free so that it’s accessible. We seek to operate in non-capitalist/anti-capitalist modes as much as possible. We are not making money off of RAD. Rather, we want to engage in mutual aid with other people who share anarchist values as a way to build and sustain the unconference for all of us. People are needed to produce art, food, transportation, housing, and planning.
Make it Happen
When you donate the paypal will say the money is going to Lily this is an account used solely for RAD purposes
